Social Insecurity
Perennially, probably related to the dark days of winter, I experience social insecurity remembering that most of my social supports are contingent upon the age of my children. Our Bible-study is limited to couples with children through high-school age. I could remain a member of my home-schooling support group when I am no longer home-schooling, but do I want to? Seems somehow grasping. In MOPS leadership, I am but a guest as it is.
This summer, I will not even be needed to drive the ladies to the free movies. It isn't so much that I need to be needed, although you task-oriented people may choose to believe that. No, I will be losing my opportunities for fun. Being shy, or maybe just slow to warm up, I am most comfortable where I can belong simply by showing up.
How sad to be excluded merely on the basis of having completed this season of life. It's going to be a long time before I am 55.
This summer, I will not even be needed to drive the ladies to the free movies. It isn't so much that I need to be needed, although you task-oriented people may choose to believe that. No, I will be losing my opportunities for fun. Being shy, or maybe just slow to warm up, I am most comfortable where I can belong simply by showing up.
How sad to be excluded merely on the basis of having completed this season of life. It's going to be a long time before I am 55.
posted by Rebecca | 3:30 PM
4 Comments:
I think you may be surprised at the opportunities that present themselves once you have the time and energy to accept them. I know my church has a million things going on; there is no way I could do everything that interests me. I recently joined AAUW (American Association of University Women) and they have a bunch of fun things going on too (unfortunately, most of them are daytime).
I also believe that you will hear a calling as to how to fill your time once the girls leave the nest. I still think that you should volunteer at one of those programs that gives work wardrobes to women who are getting off welfare. You would be awesome at helping them pick out work-appropriate outfits that make them feel and look their best. The program in Spokane is called Our Sister's Closet.
The "unfortunately" on my end, with regard to scheduling, is that the fun things are usually in the evening. I also have a number of friends that I can't keep up with as I would like, for the same reason. I realize that mothers of young children like evening activities because Dad can watch the kids, but where does that leave the "family evenings"?
I will look into the "sister's closet". When I was in PT, I saw some info on the bulletin board at SJBC but I have never heard of a similar program here. There has to be someone who would find all this information useful.
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I, too, am slow to warm up when making new friends. I found that working together helps bonding. I have had good luck meeting people when volunteering with our local SHARE co-op distribution.
-- Slughorn
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